Etiquette of Discussion and Expressing Opinions
Debate on the Internet has become an inseparable part of our daily lives, especially with the rise of social media applications in all their forms. Opinions now emerge from every direction, and it is in our nature to respond or comment on these opinions and engage in discussions, whether we agree or disagree. We also publish our own views, opening them to discussion. For such engagement, there are many etiquettes that must be observed and applied.
Every opinion has its proper audience and community. One should pay attention to where they publish their opinion and who is being addressed. As ʿAbdullāh ibn Masʿūd (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “You will never tell people something that their minds cannot grasp without it becoming a trial for some of them.”
Hadith
ʿAbdullāh ibn Masʿūd (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “You will never tell people something that their minds cannot grasp without it becoming a trial for some of them.”
A Muslim should speak kindly, as Allah Almighty says: “And tell My servants to say that which is best” (Al-Isrāʾ 17:53), and “Argue with them in a way that is best” (Al-Naḥl 16:125). If one fears their words may cause harm or lead to quarrels, they should refrain. Abū Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day should speak good or remain silent.” If you enter a discussion with the intention of advising or clarifying a mistake, but find the other party unaccepting, abusive, or arrogant, it is better to withdraw and not reply. Such restraint is part of the noble manners that distinguish the Muslim. Allah also says: “Whether you show a good deed or conceal it or pardon an offense – indeed, Allah is ever Pardoning and Competent” (Al-Nisāʾ 4:149). Perhaps the most beautiful verse describing the conduct of a Muslim is Allah’s command to His noble Messenger ﷺ: “Take what is given freely, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the ignorant” (Al-Aʿrāf 7:199).
Qur'an
“And tell My servants to say that which is best.” (Al-Isrāʾ 17:53)
“And argue with them in a way that is best.” (Al-Naḥl 16:125)
“Whether you show a good deed or conceal it or pardon an offense – indeed, Allah is ever Pardoning and Competent.” (Al-Nisāʾ 4:149)
“Take what is given freely, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the ignorant.” (Al-Aʿrāf 7:199)
Hadith
Abū Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day should speak good or remain silent.” (Sahih al-Bukhari and Sahih Muslim)
Dialogue for Daʿwah (Inviting to Islam)
The Internet and social media have become among the best and fastest means for daʿwah (calling others to Islam). They should therefore be used for goodness and virtue. Allah Almighty says: “And who is better in speech than one who calls to Allah, does righteousness, and says, ‘Indeed, I am of the Muslims’” (Fuṣṣilat 41:33). There are even specialized sites dedicated to daʿwah and dialogue with non-Muslims. Whoever wishes to engage in daʿwah dialogue should possess certain qualities that distinguish them, such as:
Qur'an
“And who is better in speech than one who calls to Allah, does righteousness, and says, ‘Indeed, I am of the Muslims.’” (Fuṣṣilat 41:33)
Strength of evidence: Whoever lacks sound evidence or the ability to present and substantiate it properly should avoid engaging in dialogue. Otherwise, they may give the other party an opportunity to cast doubt or become more confident in their opposing stance. Allah Almighty says: “Those who disbelieved among the People of the Scripture and the polytheists were not to be parted until there came to them clear evidence – a Messenger from Allah reciting purified scriptures within which are correct writings” (Al-Bayyina 98:1–3).
Qur'an
“Those who disbelieved among the People of the Scripture and the polytheists were not to be parted until there came to them clear evidence – a Messenger from Allah reciting purified scriptures within which are correct writings.” (Al-Bayyina 98:1-3)
Mastery of language: This is a very important point. A lack of proficiency in the language may cause misunderstanding, miscommunication, or distortion of meaning, which could drive the other party away or discourage them from engaging in such dialogue again.
Good listening: Listening attentively to the other person without interrupting them until they finish their speech is a sign of a respectful and well-mannered interlocutor. It enables better understanding and more effective advising. Al-Hasan al-Baṣrī said: “When you sit with people, be more eager to listen than to speak. Learn the etiquette of good listening just as you learn the etiquette of good speech, and do not interrupt anyone’s talk.”
Hadith
Al-Hasan al-Baṣrī said: “When you sit with people, be more eager to listen than to speak. Learn the etiquette of good listening just as you learn the etiquette of good speech, and do not interrupt anyone’s talk.”
Speaking according to the culture and level of the other party: As mentioned in the introduction to the etiquette of discussion, the speaker should consider the environment and cultural context of the other person so that their words are understood and their intention is clear.
Gentleness and kindness in dialogue: The best example is found in Allah’s words to Mūsā and his brother Hārūn (peace be upon them) when He commanded them to go to Pharaoh and invite him: “And speak to him with gentle speech that perhaps he may be reminded or fear [Allah]” (Ṭā-Hā 20:44). Allah commanded His prophets to address Pharaoh—despite his extreme arrogance—with gentleness and softness. How much more should this apply when addressing an ordinary person who has shown no obstinacy or arrogance?
Qur'an
“And speak to him with gentle speech that perhaps he may be reminded or fear [Allah].” (Ṭā-Hā 20:44)